A thin plate of glass stands before me protecting me from the elements. The happiness creeps in as I watch the peculiarities of the ducks and chickens outside my window. For a moment, my tears subside. Falling out of my daze and coming back to reality, the happiness fades and the tears begin to well up again.
I know people in this world suffer more than I on a daily basis, but that doesn’t change the desire for and lack of joy in my life. Don’t get me wrong, I have bouts of happiness as we journey on, but true joy evades me and I only have one person to blame.
Tears to water the harvest
Last Sunday, our pastor spoke on Psalms 126. He spoke on this concept of Joy versus Happiness. “Joy,” he says, “is not a fleeting emotion that comes and goes depending on circumstances. That is happiness. But Joy, is a gift given to us by God when we live in his purpose.” To translate, Joy is not a moment in your life, but an overall outlook on how we perceive our life as a whole.
The tears that come are not indications of the big picture, but of the emotional moment we reside in. When I look to the future, I increase stress and anxiety in my life. However, when I look to the past and see all that God has done for me, I get a glimmer of hope. But in times like these, it is hard to “count it all as joy.”
Who’s to blame and how do I fix it?
The truth of the matter is that I am the one to blame and not God or any human individual that has done me wrong. In Psalms, David wrote that we are to use the tears of our sorrow to water the seeds that we are planting. He says that through our faithful planting during hard times that we will reap Joy.
So bottom line, not only am I to blame for the moment of sorrow and tears, but I am responsible for using this emotion to my advantage. God didn’t promise we would always experience happiness, but he did promise that if we live in his purpose, we will live in a state of Joy. What does Joy look like to you?
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