I just stood there, no plan. Eyes closed. Body still. Every bead hits my head with its own agenda then rolls down creating the only motion in the room.My motionlessness does not reflect the storm raging inside my head.“I screwed up.”“What was I thinking?”“I was too careless.”“Did we move too fast?”“What now?”“What am I going to do for money? How am I going to pay bills? What am I supposed to do now?”I stand there in the shower rehearsing the conversations and decisions that led me to this point. I know without a shadow of doubt, that my first ...