The Love Dare

Show Your Responsibility

 October 17, 2020

By  Jonathan Biles

Love Dare Day 26: April 14, 2020

Before I begin today’s post, I want to give a shout out to my parents for teaching me how to own my responsibility and not blame others for my mistakes.

What is Day 26 about:

I hear it every single day in my children, “It’s not my fault!”

My kids range in ages from 3 years old to 18 years old and each struggle with their own set of life challenges. I am determined to ensure that today’s chapter is a lesson we model and we lead with the understanding of true responsibility.

What do I think about the material:

At the time I am writing this post, I am a 40 year old man who lives a life scattered with ups and downs and has a list of mistakes longer than War and Peace. But like I said in my introduction, I was lucky enough to have parents that taught me about personal responsibility.

Honesty time; I struggle with this every single day. At times, it seems absolutely ridiculous. The other day I was in a hurry making dinner and I decided the kids will have chicken strips. When I returned the bag to the freezer I did not shut the bag all the way, but didn’t really care.

About two days later, Jess happened to noticed the open bag and asked me and the kids who left the bag opened. Internally I panicked. I looked at the children ready to blame one of them when I caught myself.

What a stupid emotion to have come up inside me. Why was I so willing to have one of the kids take the blame for something I did. I am sure all of this lasted about half a second, but the inner dialogue seemed to go on for days.

I piped up and said I was being careless and in a hurry the other day and forgot to close it. Situation over and I doubt anyone else remembers that even happened. But it sparked a conversation inside that has bugged me now for a few days.

If I pride myself on my own personal responsibility, why was it that I was so ready to let someone else take the blame? This chapter deals with this type of emotion and lets me off the hook.

Well sort of.

The chapter explains that responsibility, love and wisdom all go hand in hand. At our human nature, we all want to be loved. If we are trying to become better people, then we also seek wisdom. But, neither one of those things can happen without taking responsibility.

The problem, however, we fear that taking responsibility for our actions will evoke pain and suffering instead of love. That fear has no place in a healthy marriage. That day in the kitchen, I felt fear of disappointing my spouse, so I was ready to lie.

I thank God every day that I did not marry a woman who would berate me for such a little incident. That is why I was able to take responsibility for something so trivial.

This story is to make one major point that this chapter also focuses on. If we want to experience the love our heart desires, then we as flawed human beings must continue to be better. Even after all this time and the phenomenal examples that I had, I still struggle with personal responsibility.

My task and how did I perform the task:

Today’s challenge is pretty straight forward. We are to pray through areas of our life where we have not taken responsibility and ask for God’s forgiveness. Secondly, we are to talk to our mate to find out ways that we have lost our responsibility in our marriage. And then, seek forgiveness.

After reading the chapter I prayed and later on a walk with Jess I brought the subject up to her.

Jessica’s reaction:

A shrug of the shoulders and a I don’t know type of response. We talked a little about the matter and continued our walk. I think through our conversation she feels that I do a great job of taking responsibility for my actions. Good thing she can’t hear my internal dialogue!

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Jonathan Biles. Mentor and Founder of Triumph University Triumph and achieve peace

About the author 

Jonathan Biles

Jonathan Biles is a well-respected writer of fiction stories across the globe. He has worked with multiple publishing entities from print newspaper to Amazon Kindle. With a degree from The University of Idaho and print experience with Texas Tech University, he is sought after as a feature writer amongst his peer group. His readers rate him as a 5-star author and has won awards from Columbia University. As an author, he can transport you from daily chaos to worlds and adventures sure to entertain through his vivid imagery.

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