Let’s be honest, how often do you look in the mirror each day?
Believe it or not, I have gone several days not looking into the mirror and no, I am not talking about when we go camping. In our lovely 100-year-old home, we have 1 bathroom with little to no ventilation. This means that often after a shower the mirror is too fogged up to be of any use, but I don’t have a habit of looking anyway.
The chapter today is not about looking yourself in the mirror, but about how you greet the one you love. And since this love dare is all about yours truly, then I must talk about the mirror. The chapter mentions that you can tell a lot about a couple in how they greet each other. I think the same is true with self-mirror-talk. When I stare back at my gaze, I don’t look for positive character traits, but flaws. Just last night I had the distinct honor of hearing directly from my wife that she likes the way I look, especially when I try. But that is not what I see. I see a lump of clay in great need of shaping.
An easy challenge not easily accomplished
The challenge for today’s Love Dare is to make each greeting and exiting with care and focus on the positive. Kendrick acknowledges that you will not always feel like doing this, but the simple act of intentional first interaction positivity will have long-term positive effects on your relationship.
This must be true for self-greeting as well. First thing this morning I completely forgot about the challenge and skipped the mirror altogether. Remembering this as I sit at Thomas Hammer, I went to the bathroom to take a good look. Let me tell you, the fight not to say anything negative is real! But today, I told myself that I am glad to be present today and not struggling to get out of bed, and my outfit matched! See, I knew I could do it.
More time on my reflection
A mirror is simply a piece of glass with polished metal behind it, but it has the loudest voice I’ve ever heard. Staring at myself, I remember that this face with all its flaws is the face my children place faith in and my wife finds desire every single day. Yes, I have flaws, but they make the choice to not focus on these aspects of my character, so why can’t I?
During my abusive experience with my ex-wife, self worth seemed to be her number one target. It was almost as if she could break me down far enough, that I wouldn’t object to any of her wild demands. Fast forward today and I still look at my reflection with that abusive filter. Today, I am making the promise to myself and you that my first and last look in the mirror will always be positive. I can leave the improvement pieces where they belong, somewhere in the middle.
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