Love Dare Day 4: March 20, 2020
What is Day 4 about:
When I was 13 or 14 years old, there was a line from one of my favorite songs that said love is a verb. Me being a nerdy young man I took that literally and tried to decide what that really meant.
This chapter in “The Love Dare” decided to take a particular part of the verb love and emphasize its importance.
That action is thoughtfulness.
What do I think about the material:
I truly believe that anything you care about, dare I say love, you will put great thought and planning into. It is often said that if you really want to do something, you will make the time for it. Obviously none of us can make time, but we can prioritize things where the things that matter the most get the time first. That way when we run out of time we have put that valuable resource to what really matters to us.
I believe this is what chapter 4 was alluding to. Our brains are perpetual motion machines that don’t stop thinking even if we try.
Want proof, try meditating for the first time. Your mind will wander like a lost ship at sea!
That being said, if we choose to direct our thoughts on the ones we love first, how much will that improve our relationships with one another?
The chapter says that if both sides of the relationship learn to think about their actions and words in terms of how the other will perceive the encounter, then it will revolutionize the relationship.
Can one simple act dramatically improve a relationship?
What was my task and how did I perform the task:
The task for today is to contact your significant other and with no agenda at all, ask how they are doing.
For me this happens on a regular basis each morning.
Jess and I have lately been working on a different morning routine. Her routine includes some quiet and meditation time fueled with a cup of coffee. We don’t talk much in the morning, but my first words to her are always, “good morning, can I get you anything?”
Now this did not come to me naturally, nor was it my idea, but the first time I read through “The Love Dare,” I thought of how simple of a daily gesture this could be to show my love.
What was Jessica’s reaction:
So this morning when I performed my somewhat routine task of checking in with Jess, the response was nothing more than, “coffee please.”
I didn’t anticipate a huge reaction, nor did I care to receive one. This concept has now been burned in my mind that if I can keep the pulse of my love, then my next action is quite an easy decision to make.
Over the years I have gotten better at anticipating her needs before words are lifted, and she has noticed.
But even better than that, our kids have noticed as well and have sparked some very interesting conversations and actions by our kids.
But I will save that for another day.
Day 5, I am ready for you.
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