Love Myself

Jealous of Myself: Now There’s a Concept

 March 17, 2021

By  Jonathan Biles

Application on this one might be interesting…

Jealousy and forms of being jealous are not foreign concepts to me. Whether it be Saturday morning cartoons talking about the green-eyed monster or Bible stories discussing the differences between envy and righteous jealousy, my childhood is inundated with memories of teaching me how to share. But now, trying to learn how to love me, I have the challenge to not be jealous of myself. This might be getting a little confusing.

Think about it for a second. Jealousy means wanting what others have or achieve to a degree you hold hatred toward them. So to see if I am jealous of myself, I must ask, “Is there any achievement in my life that I use to tear myself down?” Sadly, the answer is yes.

To not become jealous, it’s all about the balance

Looking inward, I need to celebrate my victories without being selfish at the same time. The challenge for today is to become a cheerleader for myself. Also, I am to burn the negative traits I wrote in yesterday’s post. The part where I get to play with fire is fun, but I am not liking the first part of the challenge. For me, my biggest personal achievement is most definitely escaping an abusive relationship. However, I don’t celebrate that success at all. As a matter of fact, I use it as a point of condemnation.

As I sit here and write it boggles my mind. Leaving an abusive relationship, regardless of how severe, is an incredibly difficult and long journey. Even when you can rid yourself of the presence of the abuser, their actions and words haunt you for years. At least that has been my experience. But I got out! I escaped a deadly situation and I continue to escape it every single day. Yes, it is a daily battle.

What did I learn

Take a quick minute and think about the last positive thing you did in your life. I’ll wait. Now, when that victory came to mind, what thoughts immediately followed? For me, the thoughts that often follow are those of negative talk. For example, “Yeah, good job Jon, but what about XYZ?” This happens to me all the time. I believe this comes from years of negative self-talk and negative others-talk (is that a word?). Today in my lesson I get to take a different thought path from now on.

It is okay to celebrate yourself and not be selfish at the same time. If I have a victory and I celebrate and ensure it is not at the expense of others, then more power to me. I am allowed to be proud of myself and the accomplishments that encourage me to try more. Today I learned that the positive reinforcement I give my children all day long can also be applied to my life.

Have you ever wanted to be a copywriter or looking for a side-hustle? Check out Nicki’s page. She got me started down this amazing journey.

Erase Shame Between the Sheets!
Sex is often seen as a taboo subject, which is why we must start the conversation to remove the false stigmas.
Check out Jessica B. and her lotions, potions and things that go buzz in the night!

Curious what I do on my free time when I am not writing?
Check out my business’ home page: CCSE

Jonathan Biles. Mentor and Founder of Triumph University Triumph and achieve peace

About the author 

Jonathan Biles

Jonathan Biles is a well-respected writer of fiction stories across the globe. He has worked with multiple publishing entities from print newspaper to Amazon Kindle. With a degree from The University of Idaho and print experience with Texas Tech University, he is sought after as a feature writer amongst his peer group. His readers rate him as a 5-star author and has won awards from Columbia University. As an author, he can transport you from daily chaos to worlds and adventures sure to entertain through his vivid imagery.

{"email":"Email address invalid","url":"Website address invalid","required":"Required field missing"}